It took a while, but one of us finally found a wine that hits the spot. It is G Spot wine. Turns out it’s been lurking in the Barossa Valley all this time. It is grenache wine imported by Joshua Tree Imports of Duarte, California. Over in Washington’s Columbia Valley, the Naked Winery takes it one step further.
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Something tells me, the less said, the better. Nice Jugs is California wine produced by Kaz, of Kenwood, California. Censored is made by Crushpad in San Francisco, California. This location and the ropes remind me of SNL’s excellent skit about Nancy Pelosi.
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I hope it won’t be necessary to explain the above, to any substantial extent. If we are doing this right, the above should largely speak for itself. Both of the above are wines, but they have entirely different outlooks. The Ménage à Trois wine, on the left, seems to approve situations involving more than four feet in the same bed. Eight thousand miles away, Three’s A Crowd seems to disapprove of any such situations. It is beyond the scope of this blog to arbitrate this heated issue.
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Way back in December of 2008 we ran Part 1 and Part 2. We didn’t really expect to see too many more variations on this theme, or that it could go a whole lot further. But alas we may have underestimated the frat-boy contingent of the alcohol beverage industry. Not that we think it does or should offend any “adult beverage” consumer. Perhaps the liqueur is Chinese and pronounced Fu-Chen. Perhaps the ale is German. It’s quite possible that our mind is in the gutter, and these labels have nothing whatever to do with sex, but we wouldn’t put any money on it. Lest anyone be unduly offended, I have two kids and I am pretty sure it would take something more than this to set them off kilter. The Fokker Ale is made by Azalea Coast Brewing, in Wilmington, North Carolina. The Fuchen Liqueur is herbal liqueur, imported by BPNC of Temperance, Michigan. We appreciate the irony that this liquor company is situated in Temperance of all places, and a lot of other people apparently felt the same way, as the company has recently changed its name to The Temperance Distilling Company.
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Plenty of labels with teasing, pimps and strippers. I will go out on a limb and commend the photo on the left. It’s about as “tasteful” and arty as a “strip tease” label should be, in our opinion. And, she’s not so skinny as the woman to her right. I am not so sure I’d go out on the same limb for the imagery on the right, but it’s undoubtedly a fine choice if you’re in the market for an almond flavored grape wine (and much classier than this one). Strip Tease is Argentina sparkling red wine. VIP Almond Sparkle is made by Weibel in California.
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Sin City seems to be alive and well in the hearts and minds of drinkers and marketers everywhere. Sin City Whiskey (above) is imported by Side Pocket Foods of Oregon. Viva Las Vegas is a California white wine bottled by Cartlidge & Browne Winery of American Canyon, California.
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