We would never want to suggest that alcohol can solve all the world’s problems. But, for those having trouble keeping their pants on, we would strongly recommend just a small dose of the Pantius Droppus. It’s made by The Ellicottville Brewing Company of Ellicottville, New York. And for those having trouble with another person’s pants staying on, we would have to recommend the Panty Peeler (above). It’s not a small problem.Continue Reading Leave a Comment
Girls Gone Wild (and Wine)
I have absolutely no idea what the gals on the left are doing, but it certainly caught our attention. I am not sure it has much to do with wine. Or it’s really good wine. The ladies on the right are indulging in more commonly seen behavior, so far as we can tell. Playmates (above) is Barossa Valley grenache, imported by Joshue Tree of Duarte, California. The importer helpfully points out that: “They seem close. … More than friends? … They enjoy being together. … Grab yourself a Playmate and get intimate!” Girls Gone Wine amber wine is one in a line of several dozen wines made by Shady Ladies, LLC in Broken Bow, Oklahoma.Continue Reading Leave a Comment
Well Hung Wine
Plenty of labels call attention to feminine endowments, but we haven’t seen too many labels that point so directly to male equipment. Well Hung wine is produced and bottled by Virginia Wineworks of Charlottesville, Virginia. The back label brags that “Our wines stand up to any occasion!” Any other good examples out there?Continue Reading Leave a Comment
Tags: risqué, sexual, writing/witty/funny
Pee Like a Racehorse (or an Old Woman)
Is it a good old word or a bad one? Well it’s certainly an old word. The Online Etymology Dictionary says it goes back to around 1290:
piss (v.) … c.1290, from O.Fr. pissier “urinate” (12c.), from V.L. *pissiare, of imitative origin. As a pure intensifier (cf. piss-poor, piss-ugly, etc.) it dates from World War II. Pissed off “angry, fed up” is 1946, U.S. slang. To piss off “go away” is attested from 1958, chiefly British. Piss and vinegar first attested 1942. Piss-prophet “one who diagnosed diseases by inspection of urine” is attested from 1625. Piss proud “erect upon awakening” is attested from 1796.
It pops up fairly often on beer and wine labels. Above is Horse Piss Beer, made in Louisville, Kentucky. Another beer along these lines is Piss Brand Beer, made in Australia. And then there is Pisse Vieille wine, from Beaujolais. Wiki explains the name thusly:
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The Brouilly cru also contains the famous Pisse Vieille vineyard (roughly translated as “piss old woman!”) which received it name from a local legend of a devout Catholic woman who misheard the local priest’s absolution to “Allez! Et ne péchez plus.” (Go! And sin no more.) as “Allez! Et ne pissez plus.” (Go! And piss no more). The vineyard name is...
Tags: business strategy, risqué, would you approve it?, would you drink it?, writing/witty/funny
Suck & Blow
Here is Suck & Blow. It is orange wine with natural flavors. But somehow we don’t think people are buying this mainly for the fine wine. It looks like fun. It is one of only a few “interactive” beverages. The producer describes it as:
the only interactive jello shooter that turns an ordinary shot experience into something sexy, fun and extraordinary. It’s the unique method of delivery that drives everyone wild and creates an exciting new way for people to drink and meet. It’s perfect for livening up a party, energizing a bar and creating an atmosphere of fun and enjoyment. Drinking shots will never be the same.
TTB first approved this in 2004, when it was spirits-based. TTB insisted that the container must include the “not for children” icon. The brand is owned by a couple of blokes in South Carolina, and the product is bottled by Mango Bottling of Cocoa, Florida.Continue Reading Leave a Comment
Tags: container, functional, legally interesting/controversial, non-liquid, risqué
Ass Kisser Chardonnay
Thanks to Barry Strike for bringing this label and controversy to our attention. Barry is a lawyer at Hinman & Carmichael in San Francisco, where he has practiced wine and beverage law for many years. Barry explained:
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In mid-2008, TTB approved four wine labels with the brand name above. The wines are made in Australia and imported by Rocland Wine Imports, of California. Either TTB is developing a sense of humor or the examiner is an ardent animal lover. (Or perhaps the examiner thought this was an animal husbandry reference?) In any case, this is a good example of TTB’s approval of a label with a brand name that likely would have been regarded as profane a few years ago. Notwithstanding TTB’s apparent embrace of humorous, daring labels, some state regulators are not as enlightened. The state of Michigan recently refused to allow Big Ass brand wine to be sold in the state. Lacking any applicable regulatory or statutory basis for disapproving the label, the state claimed it was racist(?!). The Big-Ass Coalition must have applauded the state’s bold step to protect big asses everywhere.
Tags: legally interesting/controversial, policy, risqué, would you approve it?