We’ve probably posted a fair number of sexist labels. To help balance things out, here we have a bunch of feminist wine labels. I’m Not Your Waitress is one in a series of wines made and bottled by Lac Belle Amie of Elizabethtown, North Carolina. Bitchin’ Babes is another. And for the man who has everything, there is Sugar Mama red wine. This helpful website (“Cougars and Young Men Dating Club”) opens the door so you too can find a sugar momma (if it’s for real). (At this writing, sugarmommameet.com was unavailable, so the link shows a cached page.)

Dear Flying Dog, Please tell me about your battle. It sounds interesting. Sincerely, bevlog

The Road Dog Porter label mentions shit not less than five times. Who would have expected the Founders were fighting for a beer company’s right to say this, and who ever thought a beer company would go so far to claim it. The label says:

We spent four long years in court fighting for our first amendment right to display the phrase “Good Beer, No Shit” on every bottle of Road Dog. In honor of sticking it to the man…

Fermentarium has part of the story:

The real heart of the issue is … You can’t put something indecent on the label.  Unfortunately it is some guy in the government who gets to decide what’s considered obscene.  He might be cool or he might be the most uptight person in the world.  There is no way for the brewer to know.  You might consider something obscene, but others may find the label acceptable.  For example, is profanity considered obscene? In 2001, the State of Colorado said yes it is.  Flying Dog Brewery’s Road Dog Ale label was rejected because the label said “good beer… no shit”.  The ACLU and Flying Dog Brewery sued stating the...

Every now and then, TTB likes to say stamps (and things looking like postage stamps) are not allowed. Don’t ask me why. Maybe they look like “government symbols” or endorsements. All I know for sure is that TTB has resisted, tooth and nail, on more than one occasion. But if you have your heart set on using stamp imagery, it is well worth a try, as these many labels show. Benton-Lane is pinot noir from the Wilamette Valley. Times Ten is a cabernet-merlot blend from the Napa Valley. And here is Hardys Stamp of Australia Shiraz.

Mommy is having a Midlife Crisis. Mommy’s Time Out is here to help, thank goodness. More than forty years ago, the Rolling Stones astutely identified this trend in “Mother’s Little Helper“:

She goes running for the shelter of a mother’s little helper And it helps her on her way, gets her through her busy day “Things are different today” I hear every mother say.

The song tells the tale of a “little yellow pill” that helps mom through her busy day. Along comes Oskar Blues Brewery with Mama’s Little Yella Pils beer. It’s not exactly what Keith Richards and Mick Jagger had in mind (Valium or Quaaludes, according to this). Even Santa needs some help from time to time.

Did you ever wonder what Spanky (aka George McFarland) would drink? Neither did we, until we saw this rash of wines devoted to and inspired by spanking. It’s tough to beat Smack My Ass & call me Sally. It is red wine bottled by Clos La Chance of San Martin, California. The whole world wide web is insufficient to the task of explaining this term’s origin; the trail stops here. (Speaking of which, the small image at upper right is courtesy of All Things Spanking, and nobody should be surprised there is a site devoted entirely to “eclectic adult spanking.”) Spank Me Pink is red wine with no appellation, produced by Lac Belle Amie of Elizabethtown, North Carolina. The Sisters patiently explain “when she’s good she’s bad, and when she’s bad she’s even better.” Refusing to be left out of the action, Tyranena Brewing slaps a Spank Me Baby! sticker on its barleywine ale labels. In a stunning coincidence, we learn that long after Our Gang wrapped up in the 1940s, Spanky spent his later years selling — wine.