Way back in December of 2008 we ran Part 1 and Part 2. We didn’t really expect to see too many more variations on this theme, or that it could go a whole lot further. But alas we may have underestimated the frat-boy contingent of the alcohol beverage industry. Not that we think it does or should offend any “adult beverage” consumer.
Perhaps the liqueur is Chinese and pronounced Fu-Chen. Perhaps the ale is German. It’s quite possible that our mind is in the gutter, and these labels have nothing whatever to do with sex, but we wouldn’t put any money on it.
Lest anyone be unduly offended, I have two kids and I am pretty sure it would take something more than this to set them off kilter.
The Fokker Ale is made by Azalea Coast Brewing, in Wilmington, North Carolina.
The Fuchen Liqueur is herbal liqueur, imported by BPNC of Temperance, Michigan. We appreciate the irony that this liquor company is situated in Temperance of all places, and a lot of other people apparently felt the same way, as the company has recently changed its name to The Temperance Distilling Company.
Yerba Mate
Here is one of only a few TTB-approved beverages made with yerba mate.
The wiseGeek says:
Yerba mate is one of the most popular natural sources of caffeine in subtropical South America, especially Argentina and Paraguay. Yerba mate leaves can be used to make an infusion that resembles green tea, although much stronger. Yerba mate has about 50 mg of caffeine per six-ounce cup.
By contrast, a cup of brewed coffee has about 2-3 times more caffeine.
MateVeza is an “Organic India Pale Ale Brewed with Yerba Mate.” The label says it is “naturally caffeinated.” It is made by Mendocino Brewing in Ukiah, California.
No Refund for BigHorn
Here we have an embarrassment of riches. We didn’t expect to see one beer label about the intricacies of the Internal Revenue Code — let alone two.
Tax Ale is a classic from way back in 1996 (hence the miserable photocopy). The fine print, below the big screw, says:
Warning: This beer is not approved by the Internal Revenue Service. Brewed with compassion for Internal Revenue. … By the Special Audit and Brewing Company.
Ominously, BigHorn only lasted a few more years and got its last approval in 1999. Meanwhile, Lagunitas is still busy tweaking the government left and right. The top of the Correction Ale label seems to refer to section 401(k) of the Internal Revenue Code, and our dwindling retirement accounts. The text on the right side of the label says:
Who would ever [give] their money to a guy with a name like “Made-Off”? … If it was all too good to be true, it was. … OK, we all partied down and, YES, we took some liberties with some of our female guests. But now it’s the day after Mardi Gras when everyone kneels down and prays. Apparently it really is possible to have too much fun. But it is far better to have partied and lost than never to have partied at all. Gracefully surrender the things of 2008. Smoke a fag, drink a beer, and buy toothpaste… in that order. Live to party again.
It sure seems like Tony Magee (company founder) knows how to have a good time.
Jamie Foxx Blames It on Booze
When it comes to the top subjects for music, sex and romance would have to take the cake. There are tens of thousands of great ones, and the total number is too high to count. It is quite possible that alcohol beverages take the number two position, for better and for worse. We can’t help but notice a big number of songs about beer, wine and spirits. In this occasional series, we will try to find the songs that are most relevant and timely — especially if they refer to specific brands, social issues, or the law.
Right now, the #4 song in America is “Blame It” by Jamie Foxx. It’s about alcohol and shows many famous brands. The lyrics incude:
Blame it on the Goose
Got you feeling loose
Blame it on Patron
Got you in the zone
Blame it on the a a a a a alcohol
Girl what you drinking?
Just one more round and you’re down
Blame it on the vodka…Henny…blue top
Couple more shots you open up a like a book
Like it or not, this probably speaks to those under 40 a lot more than any government warning or government report. What message does this song send? Does it glamorize alcohol too much, or scapegoat it too much?
"The Blind Wine Chick"
Don’t miss this story in the New York Times today. Alex Elman is a wine taster and trader in New York. She happens to be blind and this appears to hold her back from almost nothing. Alex explains:
I call myself the blind wine chick. … I’ve always had that sense of smell and taste that’s been heightened. … I’m in that glass. … I see the grapes. In my mind’s eye of course. I see the soil.
She also speaks several languages, skis, swims and so on. We’ve had the pleasure to work with Alex in her wine business and can confirm that she’s also undaunted when dealing with the government.
By the way, the New York Times is doing a great job morphing from a paper to a multimedia extravaganza, and this should not be lost amid all the gloom and doom about publishing.
Goes Well with Strippers
Plenty of labels with teasing, pimps and strippers. I will go out on a limb and commend the photo on the left. It’s about as “tasteful” and arty as a “strip tease” label should be, in our opinion. And, she’s not so skinny as the woman to her right. I am not so sure I’d go out on the same limb for the imagery on the right, but it’s undoubtedly a fine choice if you’re in the market for an almond flavored grape wine (and much classier than this one). Strip Tease is Argentina sparkling red wine. VIP Almond Sparkle is made by Weibel in California.
