Clos Lachance has two fairly new wines. CougarJuice and MommyJuice. In the matter of lusty cougars, Peyton Imports was fairly early, with the Urban Cougar. Perhaps she is real, what with this site exhorting over a million members to:  “Join CougarLife.com and meet great young guys before they’re snatched up.” Foreshadowing that this theme may be over-ripe, or ripe for a trademark lawsuit, Cougar Juice Vodka slinked into the bar a few months ago. The MommyJuice label also happens to mention Facebook on the back label, prompting TTB to assert that “Information on Facebook and/or Twitter must be in compliance with all labeling and advertising regulations.”

Sen. Charles Schumer spoke at a Finger Lakes winery late last week and said many wine labels take too long to get approved. He was especially concerned about labels submitted to TTB by New York’s more than 300 wineries. MPNnow.com reported:

the delays — sometimes up to three months — result in wineries not being able to market their wines. The Washington, D.C., agency’s staff has been shaved by budget cutbacks over the last decade while the tide of label-approval applications from wineries nationwide almost doubled from 69,000 in 1999 to 132,500 in 2010, said spokesman Tom Hogue. “And that doesn’t take into account any of the time going back and forth with applicants to make sure labels they’ve submitted actually meet the legal requirements,” Hogue said.

John Martini, co-owner of Anthony Road Wine Co. said:

label approval used to take a week. One label he submitted online May 12 was approved June 15, but he said he has heard horror stories of approvals taking 75 to 90 days. He said new wineries often have long delays because their labels don’t meet the specifics of the label law, which was approved after Prohibition ended. However, he said, “Every winery has a goofy TTB label story.”

The Senator’s press release, and letter to TTB, are

How quickly times and lines continue to change and move. Just two years ago, these various military-themed labels were considered by many to be tacky. In the absence of much uproar, and with plenty of military activities since then, the march of military-themed alcohol beverages continues apace. Heroes brand vodka claims to be Veteran Owned, all American, four times distilled — and most startling — “Official Spirit of a Grateful Nation.” The brand is owned by Travis McVey, a U.S. Marine from 1989-1992. During the past few years, McVey teamed up with Lipman Brothers and Buffalo Trace (bottler):

In 2009, Heroes LLC came to fruition when Travis contacted Robert S. Lipman – a beverage alcohol industry veteran – with a business plan for introducing a hand-crafted vodka to all of the active duty military and Veterans as well as civilians throughout the United States. He anticipated the vodka being made in America with distribution to over 6,000 military bases, 6,000 VFW posts, and 12,000 American Legions posts. When Travis presented his Heroes Vodka proposal … Lipman was intrigued. The successful entrepreneur,whose family established Lipman Brothers in 1939, has been sitting at the helm of the oldest distributor of wine and spirits in Tennessee for nearly 25 years. Hundreds of pitches pass...

By now, almost everyone has seen and had a chance to partake of the many cold-activated beer cans. Here is something a little different — a cold-activated spirits bottle. Box 19 of the approval for Metropolis says:  “Labels contain thermochromatic ink – the cityscape will change when temperatures increase/decrease.” The label goes a bit further, to say “Chill your bottle to light up the night. Label changes when chilled.” Metropolis also has approvals for gin and vodka. Chromatic Technologies, Inc. explains that such inks change color as their temperature changes. “Our thermochromic inks all work the same way … below the activation temperature they are colored and above the activation temperature they are clear or lightly colored. As the ink cools, the original color returns.” B&H Colour Change Ltd. also claims to be a world leader in thermochromic printing and further explains:

The whole label or a small part will change colour at a selected temperature to show when the beverage is the correct temperature for serving/drinking. Bottle shrink sleeves can be preprinted with thermochromic inks prior to sleeving. Board packaging for take-home multipacks can be printed with thermochromic ink, to encourage consumers to chill them in the fridge.

About two years ago we showed spirits in the form of whipped cream. Last year we showed spirits in the form of an ice pop (more commonly known as a popsicle). Just last week we showed various chocolate wines, to underscore the movement toward “The Dessertification of Beverages.” Nathan added a comment, asking how long until a convergence between spirits and ice cream. Within the same week, TTB approved a line of ice cream products, with about as much alcohol content as a light beer. snoBaR is made by Brothers International Desserts, of Irvine, California. Brothers seems to be mainly an ice cream company, more than a spirits company. So far, Brothers has approvals for Pink Squirrel (with brandy and amaretto, as above), Grasshopper (with brandy and creme de menthe), and Brandy Alexander (with brandy and creme de cocoa). All of them are about 4% alc./vol. — a fair amount more than the rum raisin ice creams of an earlier era. Baskin-Robbins tends to suggest that their Rum Raisin is made with little if any rum, while Häagen-Dazs suggests that at least a little rum is used.